"Nothing that you have not given away will be really yours. Nothing in you that has not died will ever be raised from the dead. Look for yourself, and you will find in the long run only hatred, loneliness, despair, rage, ruin, and decay. But look for Christ and you will find Him, and with Him everything else thrown in."
16 days, 227 pages just to be reminded what has echoed these past months: surrender.
people dont want to surrender; it means that you lose. when your back is against the wall and your end is near, you surrender in order to have a chance at life. and God has slowly ripped apart the walls I hid behind brick by brick so that i stand before Him, humbled and found guilty of all the wrong i have done, exposed with no more escapes.
there is no such thing as an identity based on Christ. it is an identity with Christ, of Christ, and for Christ. there is no self; there is only a soul engulfed by glory and grace as soon as you decide to call upon the name of Jesus and accept His love and His cross.
I tried to balance it. Balance a life in this world while pursuing God. But truly, you cannot serve two masters. if you want God, you have to take all of Him. There is no portion; there is only the fullness of His presence. The less life I hold onto the more of heaven is placed into my hands.
when I first started to read this book, I wanted to come out a leader. "readers become leaders" as p pae said to me. but instead of empowerment, i found conviction. instead of confidence, i found humility. instead of filling my cup, i find myself pouring out and emptying the remaining drops of the person I once knew as myself.
i'm not a leader,
i'm a servant.
god continue to ravish this heart
i dont want to get better,
i want to be changed.
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