praise night

up until 7:26pm,

I wasn't feeling it.

I fixed the drumheads.

I listened to the playlist a million times.

I watched tutorials.

I posted on drum forums.

I prayed constantly and desperately.

at 7:22, we prayed

and my first words were God, I am nervous and anxious but I don't want to be because I want to give you a proper offering and give these kids a proper worship.

I was about to lock it all away but before the door closed I heard you:

"I want it, all of it"

so I gave up.

I gave up the drumheads, the practices, the prayers, the half time beats, the tissues in my ears, the unbalanced crashes and rusted hi hat

I gave it all to You and You took it away and told me: watch what I can do.

to be honest, I don't remember playing drums today. Jason was praising me for something I did on drums but I couldn't remember what I did when he was explaining it.

I was too busy.

Watching.